Welcome to November! October is finally over and the last week was not easy, that is what my own experience tells me. One day you're fine, then out of nowhere some energy suddenly "hits" you and you find yourself entertaining your dark self again and make a wonderful food for the dark entities. When you think you're done with that trauma and "limited belief", then "hello, I'm still here, we're not done yet" comes back and you work through it again. I don't know if it was a "cleansing energy" or another hit from heavier energies, but any energy that makes us go deeper and deeper into our own inner world to find, let go and heal the source of our trauma are welcomed and because of it always helps us to become lighter and freer.
How you process the traumas that happened in this and previous lives is individual, but what all have in common is to feel and not repress, to let the repressed feelings come to the surface so that energy can flow freely. Perhaps this is one of the most difficult things, to feel the pain again, heartbreak, sorrow, grief, regret, shame, anger etc. which keep our hearts closed. Many people cannot handle and process their feelings and turn to different substances to alleviate this, but unfortunately this often leads to the deterioration of our own health, as we constantly run away from ourselves and our unprocessed traumas.
When I started this "work", jumping headlong into my unprocessed feelings, my nights were filled with crying, because no matter how many times I tuned in my heart space, I only felt pain. I stopped it for a while, because I hardly wanted to believe that there was only pain in my heart and I didn't want to feel it again and again and cry quietly at night when I wanted to scream from the pain. Then, as I tuned in more and more, I started to feel something else, warm love without "external help" (videos, writing, people) and often so strong that I cried because it was so beautiful and how much I missed it, and for the first time in my life I felt unconditional love. Is it easy to stay in this state throughout the day? Not really, but it is within us and we can access it at any time if we make time for ourselves, until it becomes our standard state and we not lingering in our minds.
They say that someone who has abandonment issues and trauma caused by a mother/feminine is painful, and it's also very difficult if someone has the same issue by a father/masculine, but if there is a combination of these, that's the real deal. Yes, it's double the work, it's hard, but it's not impossible to heal, you just need willpower and perseverance and a lot of self-love. But only those who have experienced it and come out victorious after dealing with their own demons know this. When we start to roll up the cause of trauma layer by layer, we notice that the source of all trauma on Earth can be linked to "lack or not expressed" love and the core is the illusion that we get "disconnected", "abandoned" from the original creation of Love aka Source. Everyone on Earth suffers from some kind of "trauma" and this has been inherited for generations, which many starseeds- light workers are now trying to heal collectively, so that we also full of traumas and as we solve and heal it within ourselves, we heal the human collective as well, and this is how we create a healthy society.
How beautiful and good this life would be if we had received the necessary attention, love, care, safety, seen and heard in our childhood. If they had said through words - actions and energies that we are glad that you came into our lives, we love you, we love you unconditionally, you are enough, you are beautiful, you are talented, it is okay if you make mistakes, feel free to express your emotions in a healthy way, let's talk judgment free, you are supported, you don't have to be perfect, you are protected, follow your dreams, don't give up, everything is possible, express freely who you are, there is no lack in the world, you are not responsible for our happiness, and no matter what happens, we will be there for you.
How different would it feel to grow up like this if we had not been conditioned by the programs of the matrix and early life events, since we receive most of the deep trauma in our childhood and we carry this on to adulthood as we project and attract what we experienced then onto each other. When we meet people, we actually meet the inner children who have been hurt in some way, and the whole ego battle takes place on the surface, while our hearts - if we let them - just want to break out of the many high walls and love.
Many times we do not know and do not see what is going on inside a person, and we often judge very quickly, instead of seeing. Many human relationships are stuck on the surface, be it friendship, family or love connection. Maybe we intuitively get a few details from the individual, but not everyone sees the soul behind the injuries, the full potential of who they are. There are those whom we misunderstand, those we do not see and hear, there are those with whom we quickly connect on the same vibe and some we do not. But the point is that we are all "inhabiting" this planet Earth right now and we are working collectively to create a new and more beautiful and better society for all of us, so that the next generation will grow up as we would have liked. If you are a parent, please try to give your child all the support, love, care, attention and protection or whatever words or actions you wished you had as a child. There is no need to carry the traumas on, the decision to change is in your hands.
If it's shadow work and we have a "problem" with other people and we can't discuss it with them, then I says from personal experience that the unsent letter helps a lot, taking the pressure off your heart and mind and subconscious. Write it out or say it out loud with the help of an empty chair where you imagine the person, say everything that is inside of you, be it good or bad and be honest. Take away the pressure from yourself and let the energy move and release.
Another good dive in to shadow work element is questions. Ask yourself, especially if some limited belief, doubt, behaviour comes up - Why do I think this way? How long have I thought this? Don't let the mind play tricks and say - I don't know - because you know for sure, you just buried it in your subconscious. Ask and listen to what comes up, be it a feeling, a memory or a word, from here you can go deeper.
There are also physical exercises to release trauma - emotions stored in the body. There are many of these on YouTube, look them up if you are interested - Tension & Trauma Releasing Exercises, somatic trauma - emotional releasing, and breathwork.
Don't be afraid of your depths, because they are there, you are like the ocean, above the water is clear and clean, but as you go deeper and deeper you are greeted by a darker and strange world, but maybe the key to your depths is hidden there, to find out who you really are and maybe you may even find treasures. In order to heal and move up, we have to fight our couple of demons, and who knows, we might even become good friends with them, since duality is part of it. They say that your light is as great as your darkness, but we would rather keep this our shadow in secret, hidden in the depths, but then we will have always a blind spot and thus we will not be "in unity" with ourselves and these demons will drag us in certain situations and these will control us, and not we. Balance is important as self awareness.
When I started this article, I didn't know what it was going to be about... a few days ago I was thinking about a completely different topic, but now this has come. I think it's a great time, since we have entered the Scorpio season, which is the sign of the depths, the underworld, beyond the visible world, and death and rebirth...this sing is the Phoenix. Before you ask if my zodiac sign is a Scorpio, well no - I'm a Sagittarius, but since "missing" the 13th zodiac sign, I'd be - Ophiuchus - Serpent Holder, which combines Sagittarius and Scorpio zodiac traits.
Yesterday was Halloween, which was not a tradition here in Europe, but since it was infiltrated here by the American media, the new generation celebrates it. I don't celebrate and I didn't decorate the house with spooky decorations and I didn't buy chocolates for the children going from house to house in the village. On my walk today I looked at the Halloween decorations on a few houses and I still think I don't want "negative" or dark energy in my home like one house had a cobweb and a large spider swinging from the front door, or another had a grotesque doll swinging in the wind in the garden. The pumpkin lantern is fine.
Here in Europe, today is the Day of the Dead, i.e. All Saints' Day, and on this day we remember our loved ones who have already left this plane. On this day, we go to the cemetery, bring fresh flowers or a wreath to the grave, and light a candle or tea candle. On this night, the cemetery is beautiful, as many tiny flames illuminate the whole place. They say that in this period the veil that separates our worlds is very thin, and at this time the two sides, the two worlds, almost touch each other. In such cases, our psychic energy is strengthened and we have vivid dreams.
Since several members of my family have died and are buried in my old hometown, and since it is far away, I would rather light an incense (I love the Californian white sage with dragonsblood) and a tea candle for them.
The "long waited" American presidential election is here next week, which will either happen or not, whether it will be scandalous or not, all depends on the human collective and the narrative, whether the light or the cabal is stronger. Whatever happens, anchor yourself into the present moment, in peace and love, because the world needs us now to hold on to this, as well as our vision that a healthy world and society is being born.
For this week I brought a new favorite music of mine - Fire - Meduza collab.
"We got our secrets hidden inside our bones (bones)
Starlight that bleeds when all of the lights come on
It's a beautiful miracle
How you lift me up when I feel low
Beautiful everglow
Now we're shining like a sea of gold, yeah
We're on fire tonight
Like a million diamonds in the sky (ooh, ooh)
And we're lost in all the lights
Here together, we're on fire tonight"
I wish for everybody a very good weekend and peaceful next week :)
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